#237

Today was a funny day. 

I went to Mass this morning, on FLW. The girls and I met a dear friend of mine from Pigfurt. She is great and it was great to visit with her. We met shortly after we both moved to Schweinfurt and were attending RCIA with Fr L. She is super smart and has a crazy love for Christ. It's awesome to see. 

Mass wasn't so awesome. That's harsh. What I mean to say is the homily was mind boggling. This priest was a special kind of guy that had a weird way of speaking to his congregation. Odd. 

This evening my stepdad asked me to go through an old box in the garage. A box that I packed up a couple weeks after I graduated high school and the way I saw my future changed. A box labeled 'Holly' from 2004. 

Well, my Ma and stepdad live in the middle of nowhere. So some animals got in to it. Creepy creepy. But there was a box in a box that was left alone. So I took a walk down memory lane. 

I remember putting those letters, pictures, and flowers in that shoe box and taping it up. Tossing the shoe box and stuffed animals and snow globes in to a old tv box. Anger, hurt, loss, bitterness. And some glee. Some anticipation at what life had in store for me. And exhaustion- I had traveled from Cal to Mo and refused to go to sleep until everything was hidden. Stubborn me. 

As I was opening the box, I remembered the good, the bad, and the indifferent. I didn't need to read those letters or see those pictures. I remember the feelings my 16 year old self felt, what those pieces meant. And I remembered what my 17 year old self felt. 

So I opened the box, but never got around to looking at it's contents.  Because this Holly knows that this me is a lot better for that Holly. Those pieces of my past made me, me. But they aren't me. Just good, bad, and indifferent memories. 

Memories that I am glad I have.