#152

I went shopping today at the community yard sale, with G. We had a great time walking around looking at other people's junk. It's true sometimes, that their trash is our treasure! At least a few things were. G and I had fun, kid free! It was so great to talk and laugh with that chick. Really going to miss her. But we made plans for tomorrow, so we get one more day. And tomorrow P and K have to say goodbye to C... :(

This afternoon, J and I took the girls to the Kinderfest on post. As we were driving there, the skies opened up with a downpour. We decided to sit in the car for a few minutes! There was rain off and on while we were there. After an hour we were ready to go; there just wasn't much for P and K to do. But, it got us out of the empty house for a little while.

The girls are sleeping in their 'big girl bed', aka their crib mattress on the floor. They are doing pretty good with it. But we hear them get up in the middle of thee night. So we all are getting less sleep than usual. And for some reason, I have been waking up in the middle of the night. I so don't like that! I was even sleepwalking the other night. Haven't done that in a while, and it totally creeped J out! So yeah, I am tired.

My last few German beers will make me feel better... Right?

#151

So, I have been quite irritated about this whole lack of caring for our own country. I have said it before, but this is one thing that totally gets under my skin. We give and give and give to otther countries. Humanitarian missions out the wazoo. But what about the poor in our land? There are people that go without food and shelter right here in our own towns.

And now with the crazy storms we have had in the South. Close to 300 dead, last I heard. Did you catch that? "Last I heard" I haven't really been hearing much about this crazy disaster. Which led to this post on good old FB:

"Really? A different country suffers a natural disaster, and facebook explodes with "Poor them, I am praying for them" posts. People host fund raisers and food drives to help that country recover. Yet OUR OWN COUNTRY suffers terrible damages and loss of lives, and no one has anything to say... Really???"

Apparently I was noot the only one feeling that way. Which really does make me happy.

I read a study a while back. Don't remember the hard facts, or where the study was done, so forget about getting true details! But the findings were that as a nation, our charitible donations are not what they used to be. So, think about it. We, Americans, are not giving as much as we used to. And we are giving to a more diverse group. Some of the money (I want to say most, but can't call that a fact, just a feeling) goes to other nations. That means the people that need help have a harder time getting it.

But yes, lets send help to Haiti, and Japan, and Indonesia.

Don't get me wrong, it was awesome to see the outporing of help to these countries when they needed it. It just irks me so much that when Americans need help... The 'outpouring of help' is not found.

#150

Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to introduce you to Mrs B!

Ok, so I have been Mrs B for 6+ years. But this afternoon, I became Mrs B according to the Catholic church! J and I received the Holy Sacrament of Marriage, in the presence of K and T, our amazing friends/sponsors, SSG M who rocks, and Ch M who is too amazing for words. Father L is possibly the best priest in the world, just saying. He was great, and I am just too happy that he married us.

After we were married, we ate yummy cookies I had made and then we all headed home. Because we are so romantic, we stopped at the commissary to grab deli sandwiches for dinner! Yep, you should all be as cool as me. Our first wedding was also a very small deal, with dinner at Red Lobster, just the two of us. Oh yeah baby! I think if there had been a RL close to us, J would have insisted we stick to tradition!

Another high note: My baby girls are not sleeping in a crib! Their crib was smashed to pieces and thrown out. Literally. J broke it apart, because we have no tools. All of our stuff has to be out of the house tomorrow morning for our inspection (even though we will be staying here for a few more days). So the crib had to go. The little chicks are currently sleeping on their mattress, on the floor. And I gotta say, they rock! We laid them down like we normally do, and when I checked on them 2 hours later, they were still on their mattress!

Yay for my big girls.

Happy birthday, Dad. I didn't get to call him today, with the whole no phone thing. But I love him to pieces and really wish we had got to chat. My dad is pretty cool... And now he is pretty old, too!

#149

"Our belongings should not bog us down and make slaves of us. We should be surrounded with beauty, with things reminding us we are God's children."

My daily Catholic email has done it again!! Another great one, and just when I needed to be reminded that stuff is just stuff. Last night I was missing my own bed and tv. This morning, I was worrying about getting all my stuff on the plane and to our new house. But it is just stuff!

I officially attended my last PWOC this morning. Not as horrible as I thought it would be. Just a normal PWOC morning, really. I honestly don't feel like I said goodbye to anyone. That sucks a little. But it is also kind of nice!

After PWOC, I went to lunch with a few amazing ladies, the executive board that I have been serving with. I am going to miss our time together. These women have been so amazing in the last year. I really feel like we have helped one another through a lot. And I didn't say 'goodbye', just 'see you later'.

And, my daughters are so amazing. They are so darn cute! P asked J tonight, "Daddy, what color are my blue eyes?" How cute is she! She knows her eyes are blue. The girls recently discovered eye color. So, we ask them on a regulaar babis what color their eyes are. P just asked and gave the answer all at once!

And when we were at BK for dinner (yuck, by the way) a guy was standing near our table waiting for his food. K saw him and said, in her bossy voice, "Hey! This my table!" Seriously! I told her we do not talk to strangers that way. And then she started to cry! I really think she just totally forgot herself for a second, and when she realized what she had done she got embarrassed. But it was pretty funny for me!

Ok, off to read my awesome new book, "Rediscover Catholicism" by Matthew Kelly. I started it last night, and am impressed with the first couple chapters.

#148

i had a not great night's sleep last night. my dear husband, whom I love, drove me completely insane. Stealing covers. Hogging the bed. All those typical things. But to the extreme! I wanted to beat him!

So I started my day on a not pleasent note, and without a skip in my step. All that said, our last play morning was uneventful. The girls played really well. Afterwards, we went to McDs with G and C.

J and I met with Fr one last time, before we get married! Did I mention we are getting married?? Well, we are. In the Catholic church. Woop! It's only taken us 6.5 years to do this. And I am so excited about it. It will just be us, and our 'sponsons' who happen to be great friends. Small, just the way we like to get married!

And no, this is not a 'renewal'. This is the start of a whole new marraige. According to the Catholic church. Which is exciting. But that doesn't cancel out the last 6 years I have spent as Mrs B!

It's also pretty cool to have our 'new' marraige begin during the first week of Easter. :)

#147

I had my first PCS [Permanent (HA!) Change of Station, aka 'move'] meltdown. Really, it wasn't a meltdown. It was a "Ohmygoodness in less than 10 days I will be moving across the world, saying goodbye to my house, my friends, my current way of life. I will be bouncing from one hotel to the next, taking a shuttle bus, and a couple airplanes, and a rental vehicle to get to another hotel, and then hopefully to our new house. My dogs will be riding in the underbelly of those airplanes. And my two year old twins will have to endure an 11 hour flight and a 2 hour flight. Ohmygoodness."

Totally not a meltdown.

Thankfully, less than an hour into my 'mood', I was able to (how lame) Facebook chat with my best friend. She easily helped me back away from the crazy ledge. She rocks. It helps that she is too excited to see me in July!

The thing that keeps tripping me up on this whole moving thing is the goodbyes. Believe me, there are a few people that I cannot wait to be done with! But, amazingly, there are some people that I do not want to leave. I am usually ok with goodbyes. But this time around... I have a bit of a knot in my tummy thinking about it.

Tomorrow starts the 'Goodbye Train'. First stop, play group.

#146

Easter with my husband and daughters. Lovely day!

The weather is amazing. I cannot believe how lucky Bavaria has been, weather-wise, lately! It was esspecially awesome today, because we got to wear our new Easter dresses! Last year, it was pretty chilly on Easter, so we had to wear sweaters over our dresses at church.

The Easter bunny was super cheap this year, which is so ok with me. He didn't even use baskets, just set things on the table! I gues he remembered that we are moving... :) He brought the girls their Easter dresses and a few toys that they can play with on the airplane. And, because he rocks, he brought J a new Heffe glass and a bag od strawberry rhubarb gummies! The heffe glass is the twin of his favorite, that broke a couple months ago. Pretty nice of that Easter bunny, if you ask me.

The Garrison easter egg hunt wasn't so spectacular. The area that was set up for my girls' age group had very few eggs. Between my two girls, we got 3 eggs. And that is all! They had so much fun though, which is all that really matters!

My only real downfall to such a great day... I kind of felt like we were almost secluded. Which, to me, is not a good thing! After Mass, we ate alone at the food court. And after the egg hunt, we came home to our empty house.

Why am I surprised, though? Every holiday seems to go this way for me in the last year.

#145

Easter vigil was amazing!

Last year, I was baptised and confirmed on Easter Vigil. That night was stressful (not just the standing in front of everyone, but J and I were fighting) and painful ('woman' issues (:) and not really that remarkable. I was distracted on what should have been a beautiful and special night.

Well, this year more than made up for it. This year, I was able to experience the night for what it is. The night that we wait for our Savior to rise. I felt honored to be in that church, to sing Glory to God in the Highest, to receive communion, and to praise our risen Lord.

Amazing night.

Not to take away from the holiness of this evening, but... ! My morning rocked as well. Spent it with, of course, G and her gang. Love them! We dyed eggs, woop! Believe it or not, this is the first time my kiddos have done that. Easter #1, they were 5ish months. Easter #2... I don't know why we didn't do it, but we didn't! So it was fun for my girlies to dye eggs, and with their best friend. Love it.

#144

This morning, I got to spend a few hours talking to my awesome friend G, while our kids played at the Schweinfurt Wildpark. As always, we had a great talk, and our kids were good and bad. All in all, a great morning!

Then, what should have been a great afternoon at church, turned in to one of our worst experiences at church ever. Good Friday, one of the holiest days of the year. 14 Stations of the Cross. The Veneration of the Cross. P and K acting like fools- running around, screaming, thrashing on the floor. It was horrible. I can honestly say, I never want to repeat that experience again.

All of that lovely behavior really took away from this Holy day. Oh, the joys of being a mom to two year olds.

#143

On this Holy Thursday, I have felt anything but Holy.

I have felt tired, and empty, and all together undeserving.

My faith is weak.

This evening, as Fr washed my feet, as Jesus washed his disciples feet, I felt the balm on my soul.

I fail as a Christian. Every day, I make the wrong decisions, say the wrong things. And every day, my sins are forgiven, and my soul is washed clean.

The peace and love that surround me as I received Him this evening- I want to keep it with me forever. Or at least until morning breaks.

After Mass, I sat at my (loaned government) table and wrote 'Goodbye' cards to some of my dear friends. I thanked God for them as I held back the tears and tried to impress on that little card how much these women have meant to me.

Words failed. But I hope, when I choke back the tears and place these cards in their hand, they will know. I love them. I have learned from them. I will miss them.

Lord, thank you for giving me amazing friends and sisters that I do not want to say goodbye to.

#142

There are so many things we take for granted in our lives. Our loved ones, our health, indoor plumbing, electricity. You know, all the big things in life. But how often are you thankful for the little things? Like power steering?!

Think I sound like a raving lunatic? Try driving a car without power steering. That will change your views, I promise.

Today, I have such a deep respect for power steering. Because it really is something I have always taken for granted. And today, I got to experience driving without it. Let me just say, my arms got a nice work out!

Following the gentle curve of the road wasn't a problem. 90 degree turns from one road to the next were hard, but not impossible. Parking? Yeah, it was a pain in the butt! I felt like I needed a couple extra hands to get the steering wheel to turn as far as I needed it to turn. And the bad thing about parking, is you have to eventually get out of the parking spot, which is just as hard!

Add to that my brain's inability to switch from a manual to an automatic transmittion, and it was a fun drive! Only once did I stomp on the break, thinking it was the clutch. I discovered I need to keep my left foot as far away from the pedals as possible, and both hands on the wheel (which is a necessity in this car!), and I am able to drive an automatic with ease.

All of this talk led J and I to a discussion we have had many times before. Which is better: manual or automatic? He goes for the 'manly' manual, of course. And I have always thought I prefered automatics- so much easier and carefree! But now? I almost feel like an automatic transmittion leaves me less in control, which I do not like! What am I going to do with myself?

Amazing friends, that is another thing we too often take for granted. This evening, we had a great evening with the J family. Oh man am I going to miss them all. K has helped me with so much the last couple years, and is my amazing Godmother. Really. Her husband is great, and her daughters are beautiful girls that love my girls. Leaving this family is too hard...

#141

The wild park we went to today was awesome!

Wild parks in Germany are kind of a cross between petting zoos, farm animals, and cool play areas. This one did not disappoint!

We were there for a few hours. The girls had a blast jumping and swinging andd climbing and sliding with each other and their best friend. And they really liked all the animals! I was surprised about that. Sometimes they can be so timid. But they were walking up to the fences and talking to all the animals! It was great.

On our way home, we stopped at my friend P's house. Her dad is pretty sick right now, and it looks like she will be going back to the States soon. So we had a little chat to visit. And a goodbye in case she heads to the States before I do. I really hope we are able to see each other before she leaves. She is such a special and phenominal woman. I am really blessed to call her my friend.

J painted one room today, and cleaned out the car. We are really getting ready for the move... :/

#140

I feel like, as a mom, too many of my stories start with "While I was in the bathroom..." Not that I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. I don't. Really. I have two kids, how could I have time to spend extra time in the bathroom?

However, my daughters take that 5 seconds that I am peeing to 'explore'. That is when they figured out how to open the front door. And how to open the fridge. And when they tried to eat dog food. And when they jumped off the couch. Really the list goes on.

Today, 'while I was in the bathroom' my lovely angel colored her fingers blue. Not sky blue or pale blue. We are talking Blue Blue. There was a pen on the table. Big mistake there. Somehow, she got the ink out of the pen and on to her fingers. Not little lines. It looks like she stuck her hand in an ink pot. And of course, it didn't wash off.

So, thinking that the glass is half full, that means it won't rub off on anything else!

And, we have changed her name to Smurf. Or just Blue. Still in the air.

How cool is it, to be a stay at home mom? I get to have all these crazy stories about my children. When they are trying to learn the role of Mommy in 500+ years (or 20 years, whatever), I can do the whole "Well, when you were 2..." I will be able to do that! Because I was there!

I am not saying that working moms are less mothers, or they are bad, or anything along those lines. You do what you want to/have to/feel is right. For me, staying at home and raising my children is what I want/need to do. It is what I feel is right.

Yes, it is a lifestyle choice. And it is a privilage. It is trying. And it is beautiful. I have really been thinking about how great it is, this lifestyle of mine. I know it is something I often complain about, and almost always take for granted. But lately, I have been trying to see God's blessings in the Every Day of my life. And I have been able to see the amazing work He has given to me.

It rocks.

And I am sure, tomorrow 'while I am in the bathroom' the two monkeys will think of something new to try!

#139

Is it bedtime??

This morning we went to Mass for Palm Sunday. The girls were full of it, so we actually spent the whole service in the cry room. I really think that is the first time we have done that.

After Mass, we met our favorite people at the oh so yummy food court, then headed to a park. Before we knew it, it was 4pm! Great times to be had. Instead of saying goodbye, the awesome H kids came to our house and played/watched a movie/ate a great dinner consisting of scrambled eggs and biscuits. Wow, five star chef, right here! Hey, the kids liked it. Don't judge me.

By the time they left, it was bathtime and bedtime for my angels. They had a pretty great day, I think. They were well behaved for the most part. And I got some pretty great hugs and cuddles. What more does a girl need?

J and I didn't have such a great day- between the two of us. The arguing from last night was quite spectacular and left a foul taste in our mouths. Ugh, remember when life was easy? Being an adult is such a pain in the ass sometimes.

#138

Really.

So, J had that shooting competition today. Yeah, what a freaking waste of time. He didnn't get anything out of it, because they didn't have enough ammo. So, he was gone from 0dark30 until 1:30 for absolutely no reason. Thanks.

The girls were oh so pleasent this morning, which was my fault. They went to bed 2 hours after their normal bedtime last night, and woke up a half hour llater than usual. Do the math, they were cranky. I accept full blame, but that doesn't change the fact they were cranky!

After nap, we went to Wurzburg. Their Volksfest is going on, and I thought "Hey, this is our laast chance to go to a Volksfest! Lets go!" So we went. All I really wanted was a brat, a beer, and to watch the people. So we did that. We walked around. We watched the crazy German guys drink and dance. It was fun.

And then we got home. And me and my husband just can't seen to see eye to eye. On anything. Yay.

#137

Most of today was spent with the amazing G and C! (That would b my friend G and her daughter/the girls' best friend C) So it was a really good day!

We went to the Bazaar in Bamberg, to pick up something G had ordered. But somehow I ended up buying a couple things! I bought a wooden sign for our house that says "God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, nor sun without rain. But He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way." Isn't that awesome?! Of course, J gave me 'the look' when he saw it. Because we have to somehow fit it in to our suitcases... But I just couldn't NOT buy it!

This evening, we went to G's house. Every Friday, they do Pizza/movie night. How fun is that?! Well, tonight we went over, as did another friend of ours. So we had a great evening. Her pizza was absolutely amazing! And the conversation was great. The kiddos had a great time, and we didn't get home until about 2 hours after their normal bedtime! So tomorrow may be horriblee, but I think it was worth it.

I am super excited for J. Tomorrow he is going to a shooting contest. He has wanted to do this since we got to Germany, but hasn't been able to. Finally, a couple weeks before we go, he is actually doing it! It is a German/American marksmanship contest, and he is really looking forward to it. I cannot wait to hear about it tomorrow! I also found out that Wurzburg's Volksfest is going on this weekend. So, J doesn't know it, but I think we will be going there tomorrow!!

Today has really been one of those days that I just feel so blessed to have such great people in my life. Which makes the move that much harder.

#136

As a parent, should I make my daughters clean their plates at every meal? Is that teaching them to eat even when they are full? Which might lead to obesity. Or is it helping them get the food their body needs? Because a two year old doesn't know what is best.

Oh, the joys of parenting. Constantly wondering if you are making the right choices, or scarring them for life!!

And that book I told you about last night, "The Hippocratic Myth". Last night I said I was liking it. Well, after blogging, I went to bed and read. And realized I am not digging this book as much! The author is striking me as very bias in a political way. He said "The GOP is bad bad bad because of A, B, and C" (I'm paraphrasing, obviously!) and I was just thinking about how much I agreed with the GOP! So yeah, not digging that about the book. It almost feels like all the opinions I share, he views as negative.

I am going to try to stick it out. I will read some more tonight, and hope it gets better. I really don't like to give up on books. But sometimes, you have to.

I was really wanting some alone time this evening. After dinner, I asked J to take the girls for a walk. Either he didn't want to, or he got lost in what he wanted to do. Either way, he didn't take them for a walk. Not only that, but he didn''t really focus on them too much. He was looking stuff up on the computer, and who knows what else. Which drives me crazy.

What do I have to do, say "I need you all to leave. Now."?? I don't want to do that. Because I love them. But I really felt like I needed a few minutes where Daddy was in charge, and I didn't have to listen to anything...

#135

Today in my bible study, we talked about St Peter. We were reading the last parts of John, and some parts of Acts. I would give you the actual verses, but A) I don't want to get up and find them, and B) this current train of thought isn't verse-oriented.

Anyway, I really do love St Peter. I mean, the guy screwed up time and time again. He was saying the wrong thing, and denying Jesus, and generally making the wrong decisions. Except the one right decision he made, which is all that mattered in the end. He believed. He followed the teachings of Christ, as best as he could. He was human, so he had some missteps, some backttracking. But he always found his way back to Christ. He showed the world what following in Christ's footsteps could look like, and what it really meant.

He really was the Rock our church was built on.

Other than that, today was a day of slowly cleaning. This evening, I really started to dig in to a book called "The Hippocratic Myth". It's all about the political and economic pressures American physicians face. So far (chapter 4) so good. It really does have me questioning what I feel is right, and what I expect doctors to do. Like I said, I am in chapter 4, so my view could radically change by the end!

#134

Oh, blog-world.

I have been in a 'People annoy me' mood today. Not all day. It comes in waves. But the littlest things are becoming huge deals in my head. Pretty proud of myself for not losing it. Crazy enough, G was also having the same kind of day. So when we got together this morning it was almost comical.

Other than my irritation mode, life progresses as normal. I am tired, but scared to go to bed. J, who I love dearly, made me watch a scary movie. I cannot stand scary movies. So he is currently biding his time, waiting to go to sleep, becacuse I refuse to be awake alone!

#133

This evening, I met with a few awesome ladies that I am blessed to call my friends. We got together and talked about a book, "The Reason for God". The book was really great aand had some amazing, eye opening nuggets. I think it will be a book I go back to many times. I got so much out of it, but know there is so much more to 'get'. And like I said, the women that were discussing the book are amazing, so there was a lot of great insight being shared. Love that!

K and P got to play with their best friends today. They will play again tomorrow, but this is one of the last times. The move is just around the corner, and everything I do reminds me of that. This afternoon after her nap, K walked in to the living room and said "I go to my new house!" Part of me thought "A-ha! So they do listen when I talk!" (we have been talking about the move a lot, and in toddler language). But that other part of me was sad to realize that this move is going to be a huge on in our lives... Ah! No more talk of moving for a few days!

Every day, I get a 'minute meditation' email from this awesome Catholic website. Most days, the 1-2 sentences are good. Some days, they really speak to me. guess which kind of day today was!

So here is what it said. "When we surrender to God's will, we start a journey to peace, contentment and holiness. But first, we must surrender."

How awesome is that? The way to peace and holiness is just a simple act of surrender. But how hard is that act! Surrender is one of the things, I freely admit, that I struggle with the most. In today's world, we call ourselves 'control freaks'. And that is exactly what I say. But in the last year, I have seen my need for control interrupt God's intentions.

I am not saying that right. I know that, because I am arguing with myself on that point... But I am trying to say: We must surrender ourselves to God!

#132 (April 10, 2011)

I lost my voice. Last night I went to bed, sounding like Holly.

This morning, I woke up sounding like a cross between a squeeky toy and.. Actually, I just sounded like a squeeky toy.

So today I did a lot of listening! Getting your point across with squeekes and whispers is just a huge pain in the butt. And getting toddlers to listen and take you serious? Yeah, it was trying.

We went back to the lake, Eibsee, after we checked out of Edelweiss. Our friends, the H family, also went. So we took turns doing family photos on the lake front! I haven't gotten a chance to look at the pictures, but I am sure they are great. My husband, my beautiful daughters, and me sitting beside a beautiful lake with an amazing mountain behind us. Pretty great.

And then we got home to Max and Ozzy! I missed my boys a ton! And, they were good while we were gone. A friend, K, checked on them and let them out a couple times a day. So we were, honestly, a little worriedd we would come home to a disaster of a house. But they were good! No temper tantrums, no destroyed government furniture. And they missed us too.

Oh, and if you go to http://www.zugspitze.de/en/winter/berg/zugspitze/photostop_zugspitze.htm
you can see me and J on the highest peak in Germany, Zugspitze! We are at 15:13 on 9Apr.

#131 (April 9, 2011

The beauty that God created is all around me. The amazing weather. The view, no matter which direction you look. The friends that surround me. The husband who loves me, warts and all. The children He gave to us, who show me what love and forgiveness are- every day.

I watched the sun (almost) rise this morning. K&P woke up at 0630, and instead of trying to ger them back to sleeo or trying to keep them quiet, we went out to the lobby. They have a'porch' inside with huge windows. We sat in rocking chairs and looked to the East. As the sun was creeping up between the mountains, I felt this wave of peace. Not sure how to describe it, so I will not try.

Five seconds later, as the sun was almost in ssight, I heard "Mommy, I have to go pee!"

So, I almost saw the sun rise over the Alps!

Classes were great today, as was the family time/date night. J and I were actually able to work on a couple things that needed working on. It was nice to feel like grown ups! And I really feel like it was stuff that will help us in the long run.

And... We went to the Top of Germany! Zugspitze. Holy terrifying! We took the lift (which is pretty much a cable car) to the top, walked around and checked out the view, then rode the lift back down. It was so beautiful! I was pretty scared on the way up, not going to lie. Not having control and hanging in the air, in a car, by a couple cables. I think any normal person would be scared! It was worth it though! Definately a 'once in a lifetime' experience. J told me 'We are getting to old for this stuff!' and I think I agree!

All in all, a completely amazing day, start to finish.

#130 (April 8, 20110

Well, hello Bavarian Alps!

Today has been a roller coaster. We woke up early, got dressed and in the car. Drove the 3+ hours to Garmisch-Partenkirchen. About 45 minutes of that drive was in Austria! We had no idea if we were supposed to pay a toll, so the time in Austria was spent playing we didn't get pulled over or 'flashed'. But alles gut!

J and I got on each others' nerves during the drive and when we first got to Edelweiss. This happens most times we travel. But on our way to a marraige retreat? Really?! Before dinner we were back to normal.

So, the Alps! They are beautiful, just in casee you haven't heard. The weather is perfect right now. Beautiful clear blue skies, sunshine, light breeze... I'm sorry, should I stop bragging?

We walkedd around the Eibsee, the pretty lake at the base of the Zugspitze. The water was fa-reezing! I know this, because P, K, and I took our shoes off and walked into the water! How awesome! The whole walk was great. So happy we did that!

The first part of our actual 'seminar' was great too. J and I see things on the same level in so many areas. It's just the practicing out those principles that trips us up.

I am really looking forward to gaining a few marraige tips to keep in our pack pocket.

#129

Ugh, I so didn't want to get in to the whole Government shutdown thing. But I have to. Because I need to let out some of the words that are totally bottling up.

Really? You really want to say "I hate the Army" while talking about the shutdown?? Hello, the Army is not keeping your pay. The United States Army is not being paid! PVTs to Generals, all pay is being withheld. So quit your f-ing whining. Especially about the Army. Telling me you 'hate' the Army is like telling a new mom that her baby is ugly- not a good idea. And by the way, isn't your husband a soldier? You really think it's appropriate to say you hate his employer?

And Congress. Come on. Do I even need to go there? If the men and women we elect to run our country cannot do their job, why should they get paid through this 'financial crisis'? If I was not capale of doing my job, I would not continue to rake in the $. In any other job in the world, this type of work ethic and lack of knowledge would never be acceptable.

And you know, I have to blame the American people. It is our fault. We elect them. We allow them to continue to ruin our country. So we have to take the blame. And wake up. Quickly.

Other than that wonderful 'hot-button' topic, my life is pretty grand. The B crew will be heading to the Alps tomorrow morning. We are going on the marraige retreat I talked about the other day. There was a lot of back and forth on that, but we are a Go. So this weekend should be awesome! Not sure what it will mean for my blog. You might not see me until Sunday. If that is the case, I will write every night and then just type them up and post on Sunday...

Now go read this awesome blog, http://rhinoden.rangerup.com/i-hate-congress/

P.S. That little story I started the other day? I promise I will get back to it when my life calms down for five seconds! The ideas have been floating around, but other thoughts are pushing it aside... Hopefully this weekend I will have chill time to write.

#128

Just another day in paaradise.

#127

I had every intention of continuing my little story from last night. But I am emotionally exhausted. And physically tired.

Last week, a friend of mine, who happens to be married to a pretty high ranking officer, told me about a marraige retreat this weekend. I have been wanting to go on one for a super long time, and have been asking J's command and the chaplains if we could go on one.

Well, I got the information, pestered my husband, and had him ask his command. On Sunday, I told the chapain in charge of the retreat that I wanted him to put our names on the list. Jacob got the paperwork signed, and went to turn it in today.

And he was told all the slots had been filled.

So yeah, i was super upset. #1, Hi, I asked to be put on the list on SUNDAY, and you gave me the impression that had been done. #2, I have, for real, been bugging people about going on a marraige retreat for close to a year now. #3, this is our last chance to go, since we are leaving in less than a month. #4, why am I even surprised? Things just have a way of not working out for me. Doesn't change the fact that it hurts me when things screw up.

Good night.

#126

So, here is something I started working on today. Actual brain cells were used to write this. Not a journal entry at all, but some sort of story forming!

"If I don't jump, I'm never gonna fall."

Yes, I actually said that. Out loud. What was I thinking?

Actually, that is an easy question. I was thinking I wanted to fall in love with the blue eyed boy across the room. I was thinking I wanted his arms around my waist. I was thinking a lot of other things that I will keep to myself.

What I wasn't thinking was 'What would Dad think about this?' Because, come on, what a buzz kill.

So there I was, all of twenty three years, wearing a dress that could easily have been a napkin, at a party, with a drink in my hand. Are you beginning to get the picture? I sashayed my skinny little self over to the blue eyed boy. I cocked my hip. Looked at him with a smile in my eye.

And right about there is the point where I wake up. Because I am not skinny, I wear clothes that cover my body, and I would never walk up to a guy. Ever.

I would also never take the 'jumping/falling' risk. Because who wants to jump when there isn't a safety net?

I'm Kelly. And this is my story. My 'How the wallflower gets the Prince' story. And my 'Sadder than a country song' story. And my 'Life is what it is' story

Really, it's all very touching and mysterious and toe curling and..

#125

I got on my computer and signed in to Facebook multiple times today.

Why???

There is not a thing on that website that matters. Correction, if there is something on that website that matters, I should not have to find out about it that way. So what is the big deal? Then while I was on, I felt the need to update my status. But I had nothing to say. But I haven't updated it in a while. But I still had nothing to say. And on my little brain went.

All this led me to think about how 'connected' we are. And it doesn't do us any good. We get too wrapped up in other people's lives. I really do not care that you went to the grocery store. And a friend of a friend having a baby is great, but not important to my life. Yet I sign on multiple times a day, and then feel the need to comment on 'friends' pictures and status and every other thing in the world.

Don't think I don't love the people I stalk on FB. I do, and I love FB. Because now I know that one of my cousins also loves my Irish Whiskey. And I now know that one of my very first friends remembers me after all these years. And I also know that grammar and spelling are a thing of the past!

Which does not make me happy.

And it makes me think of my 'When my girls are older...' thoughts.

I want P and K to know that a (.) really does end a sentence. And U is a letter, not a word. There is a difference between typing LOL and actually laughing out loud. And {{HUGS}} will never compare to a real arms-squeezing-your-best-friend hug.

I don't want them to be 'connected'. I want them to be in the moment, aware, and connected to people.

How do I teach them that in a world that revolves around texting and constantly being 'plugged in'?

#124

Sunshine, blue skies, flip flops. Need I say more?!

Yes, my friends. It was 70 degrees in Bavaria today. Which means there was one happy California girl playing outside! Well, playing outside between my running around like a crazy person.

The B fam went to the Spring Bazaar onpost today. J got a beer, which I am currently helping him drink. It's all natural, no preservatives, organic beer. Yum! Expensive, but yum! I got a couple things as well.

One was a pretty wooden heart that says "Gruss Gott" which is the Bavarian way of saying good afternoon, but it really means God Bless. Anyway, its pretty, I like it, and it was crazy cheap! There is actually a couple things I want to go back and get tomorrow...

The afternoon included some other fun stuff with the kiddos and husband. And this evening we went to a Chapel Volunteer Appreciation. It was nice to chat with my friends, the food was nice. But the thing that cracked me up? Whhen I got there, the lady in charge of it all told me "Fr and I were going over the list. And even thhough you volunteer with PWOC, you are getting your award with the Catholics because Fr said 'She's mine.'" That just made me happy!

I really love Fr. and am going to miss him so much...

#123

I am really disappointed with myself. We are in the 3rd week of Lent, and I have not made it to the Stations of the Cross at all. I am really mad at myself.

I had a good day. Got to visit with friends. Got some time away from my kiddos, nice little break.

J accepted (kind of) a house for us. There will be a house at Ft Campbell for us when we get there. So that is pretty exciting. I can stop worrying about being homeless, or living on Ramen noodles so we can afford the rent.

I am uneasy about it all though. It sucks to have to do the moving thing and making decisions thing, when you are pretty much blind. We have no idea what the circumstances will be until we are in the middle of it all. That annoys me a little right now.

Crazy, it never annoyed me before.